Flori-duh's Wacky Year    

   Did you hear the joke about a man in a Jacksonville store with a live alligator? No joke. Just another wacky day in Florida.

   The Sunshine State leads the nation in, well, sunshine, pythons, election recounts and weird.

   Also in 2018, a man holding a monkey was arrested for stealing a vehicle. And a city commissioner licked the face of a city manager. (!) 

   It was a big year for nakedness, not including nudist resorts. A woman ran bare around a park "fleeing a giant spider." A man set fire to his house while baking cookies.

   Another man gardened while naked, but cops couldn't intervene, leading to a newspaper headline: Plants, but No Pants. A bare man, worried about aliens who wanted to seize his meteorite, aimed his crossbow at deputies.

   Then there was the naked burglar in a restaurant, playing bongos, eating ramen noodles, spray painting, then putting everything back in place before riding away on a bike. Meanwhile, a second burglar helped himself to chicken wings and beer in the kitchen. 

   A man better dressed - in boxer shorts - jumped into the Nile crocodile exhibit at St. Augustine Alligator Farm. Crocs bit his foot.

   Moving on. Frontier Airlines booted a woman who wanted to fly with her emotional-support squirrel. Another woman, in a bikini, rode a horse onto the dance floor on South Beach.

   When a woman in a checkout line was passing gas too loudly, she responded to a complainer by pulling a knife. A man attacked his girlfriend because she wouldn't go to a Halloween party. What's so wrong about him wearing an inflatable dinosaur costume? 

   There's more, but we gotta go. Maybe later.

    Despite all this, we question Florida's reputation as the weirdest state. California has 18 million more people; or, is California really part of us?

       Jimmy